Americans share so much with Australians — a principal language, British colonial ancestry, a Pacific coast — and yet our differences are so vast even the most trivial is evident on a relatively short seven-day cruise from the land Down Under.
Take bingo, for instance. On cruises originating out of Australia, playing cards, or “tickets” as they’re known in the land of Oz, are not alphanumeric. You won’t hear calls of “the big daddy, O 75” when working off tickets that have three rows of nine squares with numbers between one and 90.
Aussies also play a much kinder game. Inside a packed auditorium, the hundreds who invested at least $25 to play actually applauded winners with genuine happiness — an unusual sight and sound for us greedy Yankees who respond to someone’s jubilant whoop of “bingo!” with a chorus of groans.
Good manners, fair winds and following seas prevailed on a weeklong South Seas itinerary from Brisbane to the exotic islands of Lifou and Grand Terre in the French territory of New Caledonia, and Mystery Island in Vanuatu. Assimilating with roughly 1,900 Australians on the Carnival Luminosa were nine Americans who unanimously agreed that sailing with passengers from Down Under was delightful, refreshing and, for multiple reasons, a novelty.
First, Australia, one of the most isolated countries during the pandemic, is cruising again after a two-year ban. Second, Oceania, of which Australia is the largest and most populated country, ranks low on places Americans visit — eighth, according to pre-pandemic figures of the National Travel and Tourism Office in Washington, D.C. Third, despite the Carnival Luminosa being the second-newest ship in the fleet, having debuted only last November, she actually got her sea legs some time ago. Previously christened as the Costa Luminosa, the 2,260-passenger vessel sailed for Carnival’s Italian sister brand for 13 years before being transferred, renamed and refitted last summer in Sicily.
A fourth unique aspect of sailing on the “new” Carnival Luminosa is passengers get an early taste of “Costa by Carnival.” The concept, to be rolled out over the next two springs, brings “Fun, Italian Style” to the fleet (carnival.com).
Perhaps the reason Carnival isn’t launching this theme with Luminosa is the converted ship doesn’t have a heavy enough Italian accent. What she does have is her original 120 Murano glass light fixtures and chandeliers, soothing European colors, retractable roof over the main pool and, in the 10-deck-high atrium, an 11-foot-long sculpture titled “Donna Sdraiata” or “Reclining Woman” by world-renowned Colombian artist Fernando Botero, who, at last check, resides in Italy at the age of 90.
All lovely, but a much more generous amount of oregano and grated parmesan is being sprinkled on the reborn Carnival Venezia and Carnival Firenze, sister ships with capacities of 4,072 that debut, respectively, in New York this June and Long Beach in spring 2024. No word yet on whether Carnival will add the signature whale tail to their funnels, something Luminosa doesn’t have at present.
Venezia and Firenze will have many features that Luminosa doesn’t — an array of specialty sit-down restaurants (Luminosa has only one), Guy’s Burger Joint with fresh twists like a pepperoni pizza burger (Luminosa has a grill with standard fare) and fun outdoor activities including water slides, a ropes course and mini-golf (Luminosa has a putting green).
With Venezia and Firenze soon to be the sexy and sleek Ferrari and Maserati in Carnival’s fleet, that makes Luminosa the faithful Fiat, and there’s nothing wrong with that. She’s fun when you want it with activities ranging from clubs for junior cruisers 0 to 17 to the raunchy Adult Game Night (called Carnival Quest stateside), and relaxing when you need it — the multi-level Cloud 9 Spa and kid-free Serenity pool area aboard Luminosa certainly put the “ahh” in Australia.
So does a lot of the food out of Executive Chef Evangelisto Vaz’s gallies. Everything at Fahrenheit 555 steakhouse is perfectly prepared as it should be when there’s an upcharge, and hits far outweigh misses in the included main dining room that once every cruise serves Italian pappardelle, German chicken schnitzel, Chinese chow mein, vegetarian Indian and American-style pork chops for a yummy United Nations of flavors.
Palate pleasers for Aussies are easily found in the Lido Marketplace, Carnival’s buffet. There you’ll find the “snags of the day,” and each of these thick Australian sausages is carnivorously satisfying. The daily pie available at the comfort food station isn’t a dessert, but a dense muffin-shaped pasty. The chicken tikka masala pie was especially toothsome.
Oz’s kumara chips are our run-of-the-mill sweet potato fries, but something different that’s ubiquitous abroad is smashed peas. They go for that at lunch and dinner almost as much as Vegemite at breakfast time. The stereotype is true, mates; Aussies love that salty dark brown spread made of yeast extract and other ingredients that when combined are yucky to pretty much the rest of the world. That’s why jars of Vegemite will be stored from May through August when Luminosa temporarily leaves Australia for the Alaskan cruise season out of Seattle. No loss, Emerald City.
Going ashore
Much more appealing are the adventures originating from Australia (australia.com), which sees ships from nearly every leading cruise line — from big (Carnival, Celebrity, Cunard, Disney, Holland America, MSC, Norwegian, P&O, Princess, Royal Caribbean and Virgin), to medium (Azamara, Oceania, Regent, Seabourn, Silversea, Viking and Windstar), to small (Ponant and Scenic).
A flight of about 15 hours from Los Angeles or San Francisco is rewarded with some incredible geographic treasures. We’re talking the stunning natural playground of New Zealand, the quintessential South Pacific paradise of Fiji and the incredible Great Barrier Reef with some of the best snorkeling and beaches in the world.
While those dream destinations often require taking a cruise of at least 10 days, plenty of shorter trips with exotic itineraries embark from Australia’s two busiest cruise ports. From Brisbane and Sydney you can sail to Lifou and Mystery islands, which are two tropical spots quite different from Hawaii, the Yucatan or Caribbean.
New Caledonia’s (newcaledonia.travel/en) proximity to Polynesia and French ties lend a certain je ne sais quoi to a visit on Lifou. One of the five shore excursions offered by cruise lines there features a stroll through a garden inhabited by basketball-size coconut crabs and hanging fruit bats that the locals call flying foxes.
Another tour takes guests to the Cliffs of Jokin, one of the most beautiful spots on Earth. Views of the 120-foot cliffs made of ancient, fossilized coral are stunning even without walking down 218 steps to the aquamarine water. Both of these excursions stop at a vanilla plantation.
Elsewhere on this tropical French-governed island is serene Luecila Beach with over a mile of the whitest sand your toes will ever enjoy. Tours are kept to the northeastern portion of the island, but that’s about to change thanks to some exciting happenings on the more remote southern end. Just minutes from picture-perfect Luengoni Beach is where the InterContinental Lifou Wadra Bay Resort is being built for a scheduled September opening. Come spring, the more modest Oasis de Kiamu will offer day passes that include time poolside, beachside and cliffside.
Vanuatu’s (vanuatu.travel) Mystery Island is the marketing name for Inyeug Island, but it’s a relaxing and/or fascinating stop by either appellation. A vast beach area with lots of locally run services is right off the tender landing, and excursion-wise, a must-do is the Modern Village Tour. What’s “modern” to us isn’t to the tribe members who, after the chief OKs our intrusion, provide a show and tell of what life without electricity and other conveniences is like on the very spot where cannibalism was rampant less than 175 years ago.
Cruising from anywhere is a treat, but sailing out of either Sydney or Brisbane is the icing on a Dolly Varden cake — yeah, that’s a thing Down Under. These two cities, Australia’s largest and third-largest, respectively, made excellent first impressions before and after the Carnival Luminosa cruise. Both offer marvelous food, fun, shopping and worthwhile attractions, plus comfort knowing they’re among the safest tourist destinations in the world. That’s especially important when the distance from the U.S. is too far to risk flying within a day or two of embarkation.
Two perfect days in Sydney must include a tour and performance at the world-famous Sydney Opera House (sydneyoperahouse.com). The regular one-hour guided tour is offered several times daily and takes visitors to key venues with more wow factor coming from the docent sharing the right amount of stories, facts and figures. Held under those iconic 1,056,000 glazed-white, self-cleaning, shell-forming granite tiles are more than 1,800 events a year. Crikey! Other guided tours go deeper on the Opera House’s unique architecture and inner workings.
A visit to the Australian National Maritime Museum (sea.museum) in vibrant Darling Harbour is also time well spent. Taking the “Hidden Gems and Historic Artifacts” tour not only puts guests behind the scenes, but history comes alive thanks to riveting tales shared by subject matter experts on indigenous people, conservation and militia. It doesn’t take a history buff to appreciate being in the presence of a 17th century celestial globe and 18th century cannon from James Cook’s HMB Endeavour.
The Opera House and Maritime Museum visits are among many experiences easily booked through Cultural Attractions of Australia (culturalattractionsofaustralia.com). The collective specializes in bespoke exclusive experiences in addition to providing a virtual one-stop shop for top attractions in Sydney and elsewhere.
More Sydney tips: Get your steps in 440 feet above Sydney Harbour by climbing the aptly named Sydney Harbour Bridge, perhaps the city’s second-most iconic landmark. The three-hour Summit climb is the most popular guided tour with prices starting at $268 for adults (bridgeclimb.com), but priceless are the top-of-the-world feeling of accomplishment and exhilarating 360-degree views that make for envy-inducing photos.
More jealousy from friends and loved ones back home is assured with a stay at the Kimpton Margot Sydney, the first hotel in Australia for the California-based brand. Once headquarters of the city’s water department, the hotel (kimptonmargotsydney.com) in the central business district blends 1939 art deco architecture with contemporary Australian style that includes fine dining at Luke’s Kitchen and a chic lobby bar.
A must-see while in Brisbane for the day or two is the well-run and highly interactive Lone Pine Koala Sanctuary (lonepinekoalasanctuary.com). It’s a greatest hits of Australian wildlife a half-hour from downtown. Add-ons include holding a koala for the cutest photos and buying food to handfeed kangaroos so gentle they don’t even think about punching your face or kicking below the belt.
When buying food for yourself in Brisbane, senses are satisfied at City Winery (citywinery.com.au) in the city’s tony James Street neighborhood. Modern Aussie fare is paired with some excellent small-batch, homemade wines, and right outside is some of the best designer boutique shopping anywhere.
Another hot spot for grub and grog is Izakaya Publico (izakayapublico.com) within the city center’s Hotel Indigo. The Japanese cuisine served here and the adjoining, more casual Bar 1603 rival the authenticity and flavor found at Tokyo’s best robatayaki restaurant, Inakaya. Not very Australian, but sure beats Vegemite.
